Friday, November 13, 2009

Butterfly's Due Date

Wishing you were still in my tummy.  Wishing you were here with that gurgly sweet sound a newborn makes that we mommies pretend is your laugh.  I think of how cute you would have been if you could have breathed with that tiny chest.  You would have been daddy's REALLY little girl, but he would have spoiled you to know end.  He spoils you and you are not even here.  He is planning to buy you flowers today for your funeral tomorrow.  I told him to pick whatever flowers he would buy for his daughter, not me, but his little girl.  He was quiet on the phone, but I could tell he was going to find the BEST ones for you.  I can't wait to see what he picks.

The boys tried to make me happy by singing my favorite song, Brown Eyed Girl.  I was wondering today if you had them too.  I think I will just say you do.  We can share the song together.
The cardinal that was tapping at our window the day before you were born left us about a week ago.  I was sad because we thought it was a "sign" of you from God.   Guess what, he came back this morning tap, tap, tapping.  It made me happy.

JJ and I said that we loved each other forever this morning.  He added that we would see each other in heaven some day and still love each other.  I said that we would finally get to spend time with you.  He agreed, but he said he didn't want to come until after he had children and after I went up there first.  I told him that was fine because I want to spend some time with you before they all get there.

Love you baby doll! 

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