Daddy's Little Girl

" Here she is

All peaches and cream

Our sweet little girl,

Our long awaited dream."

-Author Unknown

My dear hubby has been much on my mind lately.  I left him last weekend to go on a scrapbook retreat.   I honestly didn't hesitate because he has always taken care of the boys without any difficulty. 

I also know that he is quite capable of taking care of a baby.  He had to take care of our two older boys when they were babies when I used to work evening and night shifts as a young nurse in the Army. 

What is on my mind is that I still haven't asked him is what he thinks of having another baby.  Let alone what he thinks about having another boy.  What I haven't asked him is how he is feeling?  I haven't even asked him about how his grief is with this arrival of such a bundle of joy.  Least of all, I haven't asked him if having another boy makes him miss his little girl all the more.  I can honestly say that it has.  I wish she was here.

 

But here is what I DO know.

I know that he lovingly tends to Jamie's tree. 

 I know that he is able to say her name without choking up.

  I know that he shares my blog with others. 

 I know that he is supportive of my blog, my online support group, and my craziness (like mailing my doppler to Canada yesterday to a CTT momma carrying a rainbow baby).

  I know that I sent him this link to an article that was brought to my attention on my online support group.  It is the story about three NCAA basketball coaches that all have a common bond.  The loss of their babies.  We are HUGE fans of college basketball (just ask my mom...I think she knows all the Big East teams after her visit)Dearest hubby immediately responded to my email.  He said that he had seen it featured on CBS sports during the tournament.  His quote "it was an unbelievable piece.  I forgot to tell you about it."

I wonder if he forgot to tell me because we don't discuss this issue outright, or if he really just forgot.

Why don't I ask?

I don't know.

 

The REAL Rainbow definition

"Rainbow Babies" is the understanding that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope. 
-source unknown

Why am I posting this definition once again?

  Because when dear hubby saw his sweet baby dressed in a Rainbow Heart onesie...he was thinking of this kind of Rainbow....

If you aren't sure what kind of flag it is, just google gay rainbow flag images.

Not only did I make a "FAIL" outfit (read details)

My rainbow heart (a foundation pieced heart which isn't worth taking a picture of...my zig-zag stitch looks HORRIBLE)

 and a baby hat (made it way too big at first, then when I fixed it...it looked HORRIBLE)

 with a rainbow pom-pom (cut up a rainbow ribbon and it just frizzed everywhere...it looked HORRIBLE!!!)

BUT I also....

made dear hubby go "hmmph" followed by sarcastic comments. 

Yup.  A fail.  In so many ways.

But I do hope he reads the definition so that he realizes that my intentions came from a good place. 

My execution?  Not so good!

Time

For a Quarterly Review
.....of my Hopes!

Remember this post? (Hopes Not Goals)

I thought I would do a review on how I am doing.  I figure it would either ramp up my anxiety or ease my obsessive mind.

We shall see.

 

• Internet hopes:  My URL has been purchased.  My logo is in the final stages.  The website will have to wait awhile.  In the meantime, I will use this blog and my FB page to cultivate orders.  I have organized my blog recently, adding pages.
• Grief hopes: Things have been picking up on our online support group.  What was once only about 25 of us in Dec 2009, is now, sadly, bursting at the seams at over 200 women.  I have been trying to continue writing grief or recovering grief posts.  And I am really excited about Butterfly Kisses, my very own charity.  It warms my heart!
• Sewing: I am pretty happy with the things I have made for the baby.  I am also happy with some of my custom orders.  I still have a long list to do.  Our first few weeks being parents again has set me back apace.
• Baby Button:  Wow.  What a rollercoaster the last 6 weeks have been.  Yes, six weeks!  I am completely in love with this guy!  He gave us a legitimate worry when he was born, but I think I have relaxed.  I am so THANKFUL he is healthy and here.
• Embroidery:  I have been SO excited with my progress with using both my embroidery machine and my embroidery software.  I plan to learn more!
• Quilting: The only thing I have done is a throw pillow.  Bleh!
• Crafting:  Nothing much going on here.  I am sure some will pop up when I decorate the nursery and Little Big Man's room!
• Scrapbooking:  Went on a retreat in January.  I finished my 2010 and 2009 (ok..confession..have a few more pages in that one to do!). I have a new album for 2011 to start on my scrapbook retreat THIS WEEKEND!!).  Won't promise myself much, but need to get some serious scrappin done.  My hopes list was loooong for this year!)
• Family:  I think I put them first when I decided not to return to work after maternity leave.  I am officially a stay at home mom again.   They need me to keep the home front warm for them again.  I miss working, but I know home is where my heart is.

So in review........I don't think I am doing too shabby.

  But I really need to get it in gear!

Quite a handful

Sweet baby James has become quite a handful, to say the least.

  We are in the midst of changing formulas, which HAS helped his fussiness.  We also are trying to keep him busy.  We have never experienced one of our babies being UP all of the time!  He does not like to nap!  He has us a bit stumped!!

By the way, did you notice how AWESOME my new camera lens is?  You can even see the toe lint!  Ha! Ha!  My small "kit" lens that came with my Canon DSLR finally puked out on me (not too bad for almost 7 years!) and we bought my new "baby" right before Button's arrival.  I knew I wanted to take some awesome shots of him in my creations!

With that, there is very little time to be a mom, housekeeper, and bus driver because of Button's determination to be in my arms at all times. 

My sewing machines?  Sitting quietly, patiently waiting.

I just finished some framing projects thanks to daddy doing some baby entertaining this afternoon.  I might post the projects later. Or maybe not.  My computer time has been vastly diminished.

I do want to shout out to my Butterfly Kisses mommas that are waiting for me...One is in editing/digitizing phase as we speak.  I haven't forgotten you!

In the meantime.  Check out these other photos with my new lens!

LITTLE BROTHER

Little BIG Brother with Little Brother



MEDIUM BROTHER

And BIG BROTHER

Worn out shoes

"Between saying and doing,

many a pair of shoes is worn out."

-Proverb, Italian

Exactly one year ago, we went to the Carnival at the Livestock and Rodeo Show.  It is usually is quite a fun time, but last year, I left quite sad. See last year's post here.

This year,  I left laughing.  I did have a sad moment, but it very short because I just had to peek in my stroller and smile, thanks to sweet baby James.

Now to the shoe story.

Yesterday morning, I woke up and was excited because I was going to wear my brand new Old Navy shirt that I had bought on clearance for $6.49.  But, what was more exciting was that I finally had a blue shirt that matched a pair of shoes that I have had for a long time.  They have always been one of my favorite, but were very difficult to match up with outfits.  So I showed off my excitement to hubby and we were off to the Carnival!

We had to park far away and walk to the entrance.  We were laughing and having fun.  Then the "boys" peeled off to use the stairs to go buy tickets, James and I peeled the opposite direction to take the ramp.

When we reached the boys, I realized...I had a BIG problem. For some reason, my shoes felt like they were dragging onto my pants.  I looked down to roll up my jeans.  I found that the soles of my shoes were falling apart.   Picture styrofoam packing falling apart.

 Hubby started laughing hysterically, I am sure my face was bright red.

But in the spirit of the day, I decided to go ahead with the day, in the hopes we might see a booth selling flip-flops or boots in the vicinity.   Unfortunately, we never made it to that part of the carnival because the boys pooped out on us.  I definitely made my mark on the walkway. As the asphalt heated up, my shoes left trails behind me.  The once 4 inch heels, became what you see in the picture.  I literally felt the metal support under the one clang behind me. 

As we were heading back, the top of the left sandal started peeling off like this:

Within minutes, the top leather completely pulled away. 

I held the shoe in my hand in shock. NOW WHAT?!?!

Hubby had me throw them in the nearest trash.  I pulled my jeans as far under my foot as I could.  To protect and to hide the fact that I am NOT WEARING A SHOE!

  

I then tried to keep it hidden under the stroller to hide my foot.

When we finally got to the car....I could not stop laughing.

We had formula, water, bottles, diapers, and spare outfits for James. 

But who knew we should have had a spare pair of shoes for me!!!

Thank you God for giving me a moment to laugh. When I do, it reminds me not to mourn too much!!



An Irish Blessing

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind always be at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face,
and rains fall soft upon your fields.
And until we meet again,
May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

-An Old Irish Blessing

A little onesie embroidery/applique project in honor of St. Patrick's Day. 

I mean, doesn't a James Patrick have to wear a shamrock on such a day?!?! 

He is definitely OUR Irish blessing!

Can I tell you a secret?  I think I am addicted to appliques right now because they use up my scrap fabric stash. 

 I knew there was a reason I was hoarding them all this time!

Oh..and it meets Week 7 of our CSM blog challenge:

Rodeo Bound

I wasn't born in Texas

but I got here as soon as I could.

-Unknown

We laughed when we first moved to Texas and saw this quote on a bumper sticker.

Now we have been here in Texas for over seven years.  And haven't missed a Rodeo.

So Button couldn't miss his chance to go last week. 

I didn't have a lot of time, but I embroidered this onesie in honor of this "new" tradition in our family.  I had a scap piece of the bandanna fabric from a school quilt for the Denim and Diamonds auction a few years back.  It was too short to tie, so I just added a snap to keep it together.

I also made this blanket/quilt for him. 

I rushed it, so I need to do some fixing up to it. 

I really do love the Rope Font though!!!

Button loved Rodeo and Lady Antebellum last week so much, he asked us if he could go again this week!

Just kidding....Daddy wants to see Zac Brown.  Mommy and Button will go hide out in the suite when the music gets too loud again!!