" Here she is
All peaches and cream
Our sweet little girl,
Our long awaited dream."
-Author Unknown
My dear hubby has been much on my mind lately. I left him last weekend to go on a scrapbook retreat. I honestly didn't hesitate because he has always taken care of the boys without any difficulty.
I also know that he is quite capable of taking care of a baby. He had to take care of our two older boys when they were babies when I used to work evening and night shifts as a young nurse in the Army.
What is on my mind is that I still haven't asked him is what he thinks of having another baby. Let alone what he thinks about having another boy. What I haven't asked him is how he is feeling? I haven't even asked him about how his grief is with this arrival of such a bundle of joy. Least of all, I haven't asked him if having another boy makes him miss his little girl all the more. I can honestly say that it has. I wish she was here.
But here is what I DO know.
I know that he lovingly tends to Jamie's tree.
I know that he is able to say her name without choking up.
I know that he shares my blog with others.
I know that he is supportive of my blog, my online support group, and my craziness (like mailing my doppler to Canada yesterday to a CTT momma carrying a rainbow baby).
I know that I sent him this link to an article that was brought to my attention on my online support group. It is the story about three NCAA basketball coaches that all have a common bond. The loss of their babies. We are HUGE fans of college basketball (just ask my mom...I think she knows all the Big East teams after her visit)Dearest hubby immediately responded to my email. He said that he had seen it featured on CBS sports during the tournament. His quote "it was an unbelievable piece. I forgot to tell you about it."
I wonder if he forgot to tell me because we don't discuss this issue outright, or if he really just forgot.
Why don't I ask?
I don't know.
I know that he lovingly tends to Jamie's tree.
I know that he is able to say her name without choking up.
I know that he shares my blog with others.
I know that he is supportive of my blog, my online support group, and my craziness (like mailing my doppler to Canada yesterday to a CTT momma carrying a rainbow baby).
I know that I sent him this link to an article that was brought to my attention on my online support group. It is the story about three NCAA basketball coaches that all have a common bond. The loss of their babies. We are HUGE fans of college basketball (just ask my mom...I think she knows all the Big East teams after her visit)Dearest hubby immediately responded to my email. He said that he had seen it featured on CBS sports during the tournament. His quote "it was an unbelievable piece. I forgot to tell you about it."
I wonder if he forgot to tell me because we don't discuss this issue outright, or if he really just forgot.
Why don't I ask?
I don't know.
Sometimes...asking happens in a quiet touch, a gentle look, a private sigh. And sometimes, it happens in a heartfelt blog post.
ReplyDeleteHow much you have moved me this morning. If you only knew.